At The End Of The Rainbow

Time so runs, what can I say...

Only last week I got all the letters due to our Mum leaving. Some hundred it were, many people sent money with it, most I don´t even know, I left my hometown over 20 years ago.

I really thought I do quite ok, still it was kinda overwhelming to read all those kind words, to learn how much my Mother meant to some people..

One woman addresses my Bro and writes she likes to remember our Mums dry humor, the chats they had in the shop that showed her a woman with intelligence and farsightness. She goes on, some sorrows she had herself seemed smaller.
She tells that our Mum was so very happy Bro found such a lovely wife and that she was able to meet a Grandchild and see her develop, she always told her this.
She thinks (not wishes) we will have the power to live the daily life due to good memories of Mum.

And my Dad´s Sister - as little as I like her - says she is sorry that now we have to let go of our Mum so early, too (Dad died 10 years ago).
That we were the most important people in my Mum´s world and that she loved us so much.
She is glad we had this little holiday in Rügen with her, that she enjoyed it a lot, to be with us, to feel our deep love.
That we made our Mum very happy. And this is to be a solace in the grieving.
She couldn´t make it to the funeral due to health- and weather-issues. In the hospital where she was the woman in the next bed died. The doctors got her back and she said, "why did you do that? It was so nice!"
Seems that this Aunt maybe has changed? (I have my reasons not to like her)

Mum drove a Mercedes. The car dealership wrote, they wish us countless beautiful memories, that no one can take away from us, that may help us through this time.

Another card says, even when the garden of life is abandoned, the flowers keep blooming...

Someone wrote Mum took her fate with great courage.

Even my very first teacher sent a note. Her writing is that of an old woman now...

One states rightfully that our heads knew it won´t be long, but our hearts were full of hope.

Memories are little stars that consolingly shine in our darkness of grief, wrote another one.

Someone sent a card that quotes,
"Why, why?
Time does not heal all wounds,
it only teaches to live with the incomprehensible.”

One of my cousins (I haven´t met in over 10 years) wrote, "at the end of the rainbow I will wait for you, will stay seated, arms crossed over my knees so you don´t see and learn too early with which great longing I waited for you". She - who has lost her Mum recently, too – suggests the thought that the two sisters are reunited may comfort us...

Life is limited, eternal is memory, said someone.

And:

To be allowed to fall asleep, when you´re tired,
to be able to drop a burden,
you carried for too long,
this is a comforting,
a wonderful thing...

With the death of a person you loose so much - but not the time spent together…

If living on means pain, death makes sense. I think so…

I think my Mum wanted to go for quite a while but kept on going due to us and little Niece.

Some more that helped me:

Grieving means remembering lovingly.
(Trauern heißt, liebevoll erinnern)

Dead is only who is forgotten.

Friends wrote:
People we love stay forever, they leave trails in our hearts.
Only time helps healing. Our words can´t ease, but friendship can prevent silence and emptyness.

And last… you´re no longer where you´ve been, but you´re everywhere we are.

I still can´t believe she´s gone.