So I baked Spekulatius and it were too many.
I took a mandarine and went up to neighbour W, (saying I did this on purpose, of course. I´m a bad liar, but he bought it. He was not allowed to bring his wife home over Christmas, so sad - I only learned later.).
Either he lied or it was yummy indeed. He said, "yummy!".
"Not too sweet", he added.
Well, he knows me (I don´t like sweets).
Then, when after 2+ hours I was about to leave ... he finally got it out.
Why I have no children.
I think it bugged him a long time (he´s 81 and said he had no choice... too much info!!!).
I said, I didn´t want to. I know I´d be a horrible Mum. What a kid I was, nooooo.
Skateboard down the road where cars drive etc etc, fullest speed till the wheels gave up and I flew... into the grass. Horrible kid. Etc.
I´d brought mine to school and back till age 18! No child wants THAT!
And then later I talked to my Nieces on Christmas.
The Wee One was done quickly, but the Big One?!!!! We talked like forever (10 years old) and she laughed and giggled her head off again.
Serious subjects included (school).
Last time, when I was there, she slapped her leg like an old man, laughing so hard her little Sister ran back to check what was so funny (I am not really funny).
Hm.
I told W we fought a lot as Ingo wanted kids.
I said I "won" the arguments (plural) and Ingo now agrees.
We traveled a lot. Instead.
But. How my Nieces react I sometimes think... what if...?
They seem to really like me.
Well, too old now.
W said, if no regrets, it´s OK.
It´s OK, but in times like these...
My Brother "had to" / was allowed to work ("Corinna"), so SIL answered my call.
Ingo says she hates me. (The kids take after their Dad and hence me and that must be frustrating - people always assume they are mine when we´re together. Our nose, hair, all...).
I said, "who is there?? You all sound the same!" - Maybe that was it, she was united with her Daughters, sound-wise, we really had a nice talk, SIL and I!!!
W... he asked if I want the paper-plate back.
No, I have my Gurri (I wore it).
Give and take, huh.
Henry 🦁
He takes care of his people!
27 comments:
Never regret a decision you made for a reason
Yes. But doubt comes eventually.
Sometimes you have the choice to become a mother and sometimes you don't ... sometimes you want to accept the choice and sometimes you don't ... My daughter doesn't have children either ... I don't steal questions ... if she will regret later , I am glad I did not interfere!
Your burman must keep his trap shut! LOL
Ich hab dich liiiieb mein 🐘!!!
xoxo
Ella, oh, wise of you to not interfere. My mother never said a thing but always gave me "the look". Especially as my Brother became a Dad.
"burman" 😉
Ich hab dich liiiieb mein 🦋 xoxo
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Laurie, yes, but sometimes I still have an unsure feeling. But seldom(st).
Alls well that ends well.
Many people have assumed that I am eager to become a grandmother. Nothing could be further from the truth. I do not like being around children. Our daughter has no interest in motherhood and I am thrilled for her that she knows her own mind. She would hate motherhood.
magiceye, I agree.
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Shari ;-)
Well I don´t exactly hate it, it´s just not "my thing", no patience etc
It's good that you have the self-awareness to know that!
...this cookie monster would like some!
You cookies look so good. It is nice that you shared them. People in general think, oh you are a woman you have to have kids. NO you don't. My niece is 30 and does not want kids either. All of her friend have kids and they give her a hard time. But she is strong headed and says no. You did what you want and that is admirable. Have a great day today.
Tom, reckon you´re a tad too late ;-)
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Nicole, thank you! I thought I´d get rather some harsh critics for this. Interesting to learn that it´s the opposite! Have a great day yourself!
I broke my collarbone skateboarding and that was the end of that. Your cookies look good. Nice evening to you, Iris.
Not everyone wants to be a mother. So, you made the wise decision. No point in forcing the issue. As for me, I have no regrets. I love my 2 daughters and 2 grandkids.
Bill, owww. And that´s what I mean, I could´ve landed in fron of a car.Thank you, the cookies were... OK. A nice evening to you, too.
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gigi, thank you for your understanding!
I love Spekulatius and never get the real kind here, only the thin sweet ones. They're not bad, but just not the real stuff. I have never tried to make them myself.
In my eyes it is absolutely no one's business what decisions you make in life. It is your and only your (and Ingo's) decision whether to have kids or not. It is YOUR life and no one else is living it for you (and raising those kids...)
Here (Northern Germany) you - as far as I´ve seen - only get the thin ones, too, I love them!
Thank you for your support, yes, luckily Ingo is not sad anymore, but says "I"/we made the right decision after all.
There are advantages both ways but you have to do what is right for you at the end of the day.
It's lovely that you have such a good relationship with your nieces Iris, the younger will get more chatty as she gets older, they love you lots. Aimee too is a favourite with all the children in the family, we call her the Pied Piper of children 😊 Hope you had a lovely Christmas and all the very best to you both for the New Year 💜 Btw there are some covid cases on the other side of Australia but not here in WA, definitely not any community cases. PS. Did the calendar dry out ok?
You are becoming quite a chef!
I've bought speculaas before but never tried making them.
When it comes to having children, I feel it is always an individual's choice (my daughter has no children). I have an aunt who couldn't have children, and she 'adopted' all her nieces and nephews - they also traveled a lot and experienced a life that families can seldom afford. Having children is great - and not having them can be great as well.
Grace, yes, I can imagine Aimee is great with kids 😀
Christmas and New Year´s were quiet, but that´s OK!
The calendar... See first of February and decide... it has one good side (we always have to see that, right?)...
The British and African mutations of Corinna have arrived...
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RedPat, thank you! 😊
That´s what is the good thing about loosing my beloved job...
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Margaret, thank you for telling me this, truly! I have no patience, too and Ingo is hectical (with me at least!).
Thank you for your understanding, I really never expected this.
Making those cookies is easy :-)
Two children and now raising our granddaughter. It consumes our life. Lot of fun, but a lot of challenges too. I often wonder what our life would have been like without children?
I can't imagine you were that bad of a kid. But hey, everyone can chose what they want in life and that is OK. Those cookies look good to me. Smile!
I don't know if I was a good enough mum or not, but the kids were all happy as youngsters and are all doing well now. I had children because "it's what married people do", I always thought people without children couldn't have them, never thought anyone would choose not to have any. I know better now of course. And choice is a good thing.
Spare Parts and Pics, and I sometimes think this the other way round...
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Erika, I was. Same with blades and bike. Plus I have no patience. The cookies were OK ;-)
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River, yes, my Brother tried to talk me into having kids, too, after he had his first Daughter. But I felt it´s not for me. Certainly there is doubt here and there...
Some people make better aunts. ;)
(We can't all be good at everything.)
dee, I hope so :-) So far, it works!
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