We´re OK, no worries... but...
I do this since I lost my job. Living With Depression / Anxiety. Ingo thinks I´m doing what this lady does. I do not.
Let me tell you what I did:
I worked full time, always. 45 minutes driving my car one-way, later a bit less, 16 years, then FINALLY (Diesel affair at VW) in my town , yay, 1 year,new boss ,boom, terminated (no more VW-Money coming in - I was a small external, never really but for VW only).
I helped my Brother guiding our Dad in his last weeks.
Then my Brother through depression.
Ingo got very sick, ... blablalba... very looooong story.
Mum ... shitty cancer, really?!!!
Oh, I was sick myself (title) and nearly lost my arm, but all is more or less OK on that front (arm).
But Ingo has no respect for jobless-me, thank you, darn Corinna!!
(Too) Often I asked my Mum to "take me to her" - do you know anxiety.... Like... let me go.
What I would do:
Sit .... no, stand up, grab my partner, give a big hug and then... THEN sit down and find a solution.
He claims I never helped him when after being sick he was jobless, and he even might be right. He is a tough, intelligent guy. I have the same title, graduated engineer., but he is .. a man. And he was young back then...
Anxiety? What if I fail?????? WHAT IF I FAIL.
The ear specialist said, "you really have a tiny head" and every time I grab my forehead in despair... I feel it´s small... and it makes me ...
My Dad, when I was 20+ and had an ear problem he got the kid´s gear out, also.
The hats I buy, kid´s section, last one Ingo put to kid´s size, my Niece wearing a hat of mine I wore at age 14, she age 7.
Sometimes I think I´m too whatever and give up.
School, don´t get me started (they tosssed me around) - Living With Depression / Anxiety
I DO KNOW it could be worse - and with both parents having passed away with cancer and a Grandma with Alzheimer´s - I´m in big shoes with my "tiny head".
Ingo can be and is the best.
The love of my life.
I ALWAYS TRY TO BE POSITIVE! But´s so hard these years...
(yes, "years") A job is essential, even if I get enough money from renting out...
9 comments:
I been struggling and I would have to lean to depression. I didn't know you were an enginee.
I have a small head too, just fractionally too big for children's hats, but too small for ladies hats. And why are straw hats always made for round heads? They NEVER fit. My head is not round and the back of my head is flat. A German head.
"New Boss, One year, boom, Terminated" Just like the shoe factory here. New bosses, many meetings about retraining, then the factory shut down and moved operations overseas to a cheaper country. and it was less than a year, about six months.
Dora, I took meds and never will again.
__
River, my head is "round", but I´m only half-German. "Nice" to hear, though, I´m not the only one with that hat/head-problem!
Yes, colleagues said our old boss would´ve kept me.
I said to my doc that I wish the company drowns with the new baby-boy-boss and she agreed. He has a couple of horses in South Germany and tells it all the time. Hmmm. Do those horses work or do we work for them?
...life can be complex and I wish that there was a way that I could help you. You will be in my thoughts, my best to you.
A small head doesn't mean a small brain or a small heart. It's just a small head.
These are hard times for people over here. So many are out of work with the Covid. They are laid off or forced into working fewer hours and many find their businesses closed or so downsized they won't be able to go back to work and facing severe financial implications because of it. I'm glad you have the rental for income.
Oh, and whether you did or did not help Ingo during his illness does not mean that he shouldn't help and understand you -- a lot. And if he doesn't, then he needs to find a support group for partners of those with depression. Here we have the National Association for Mental Illness (NAMI) that offers resources for families to help them understand those in their circle who do have this illness. They must have something like that in Germany. He needs to understand.
Well, you are short so of course your head would be small. How would it be if you had an enormous head??? Lol.
Anyway, cheer up. It could be worse, you know. How would you like to be homeless?
I am very sad to hear how troubled you are, and how you don't really have anyone to turn to. Blog friends around the world aren't really in a position to support your spirits, and distancing must make it all the worse. I just hope you can always remember that it's not your fault.
be well... mae at maefood.blogspot.com
Wow Iris. Helping all those people you did after losing your job is an amazing thing. Husband's can say and do stupid things, but then we wives do too. It took me years to learn to not let those occasional stupid things get to me. I wish I could write something to fix life but I can't. I think you must be a strong person and I hope you can pull that from yourself. Hugs-Erika
Ich weiß gar nicht so recht, was ich sagen (bzw. schreiben) soll. Du hast eine Menge durchgemacht, und mit Depression ist wahrhaftig nicht zu spaßen. Leider ist es etwas, das so viele nicht verstehen. Ich finde Jeanies Vorschlag gut mit der support group - würde Ingo so etwas mitmachen, falls es so eine Gruppe bei euch gibt?
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